Foster Gamble
Thank you so much for your reply. I did understand you had become ill when I received your newsletter, and I did judge you wrongly on the basis of previous experiences I’ve had of other high-profile (and even low-profile) people. I’m sorry about my rash judgments (which I’m embarrassed about now…), and thank you for proving me wrong. But this is one of those occasions where it’s better to eat crow and be wrong than to be right, so I’ll accept my embarrassment as gracefully as one can.
I was also dealing with a debilitating allergy reaction (to no allergen I know of) at the same time you were dealing with your illness. I hope my allergy is subsiding now, as I have spent much of the last month wanting to scratch my eyes out.
I am so grateful to learn that I have your support for my writing project, and by extension the support of this community. I have no means to interact with society myself. I’m socially awkward and always have been, and the older I got, the more sensitive to and aware of people’s energy/feelings/thoughts I became in the throes of conversation, the more difficult social interaction became for me–until now, when I do spend and want to spend all my time alone at home. I have acquaintances, but no one I call friend. The only family I have is the one that provided me with decades of suffering, which facilitated this whole life path. My days revolve around my spirituality and my spiritual path and I don’t know anyone who is spiritual and is also privy to all of the subjects in Thrive I and II. Knowing that I have some people to get feedback from will give me more motivation to write.
Unfortunately, or fortunately… I don’t know… I’ve been experiencing some debilitating health problems since May (the allergy being one) which have made it impossible for me to progress on my book. I have learned that my health issues are a purging process that should be over by the end of July. I hope I will be able to focus on my writing project after that. It is currently many notebooks full of notes and a lot of information I haven’t yet figured out how to organize and present. It keeps evolving, meaning what I wrote last year now needs to be completely reorganized and rewritten. The very general gist of what I’m writing is represented in the original post of this thread.
I will say that, ultimately, once you come to understand that you can consciously and deliberately create your own experiences (and you take on the challenge of learning how to do it), you no longer feel fear or panic, or moved to take action against what other people, individuals or groups of individuals, are doing in the world. You lose that impulse to try to convince people to think like you. You are able to stay detached from fear and frenzy. Everyone can experience what they want to and no one has to suffer for the choices of others. How someone else votes, what someone else thinks, or does, is not something you have to experience the consequences of. I am living this reality on a “macro” (like a societal) level, and working on learning to do it on a personal level (“micro” level) and trying to understand how I got here, so that other people can get to this point too.
